I want to first say before starting this blog post that it does not exactly pertain to parenting, but something else that recently happened in our lives. I feel it is important to share the highs and lows, no matter what the circumstances surrounding those are.
The past few weeks something happened to our family. I am not in the position to share exactly what that was, but it was significant. It changed the trajectory of our future significantly. It had seemed as we were rounding out the weekend and headed into a new week that Aaron and I couldn’t catch a break.
During the three and a half years we have been married we have seen many job changes, these job changes tend to come at times where the job is needed most. It has seemed that in the past we were being pushed and shoved all around until we could finally find a place we were comfortable. Well, recently we’ve been pretty comfortable. In December when we moved back from Florida, we stayed with family then found a house in the exact neighborhood we wanted, Aaron found a great job and they welcomed us like family.
The problem with comfort is that it eventually lets us down. This is because people let us down. We may hold our bosses, spouses, friends, and family to a high standard, but they will always let us down. I don’t say this to sound grim, I say this because it is reality. There have been many people in my life that I’ve let down because of decisions I’ve made. We can’t discount that humans are imperfect, yet when someone we were counting on, people we let ourselves get close to and spend a lot of time with let us down, it hurts.
I will not say to anyone that their feelings of disappointment and hurt are invalid. I know that even though I can see past what has happened this week, I can still be hurt by others actions. It can take time heal deep wounds, we can think we’ve moved on when in all honesty, we’re still bitter. It is important to remember that we people tend to lean on only thinking about ourselves. We think about what is going to be best for us and how we can get there. When this goes unchecked it can mean that we push and shove others out of our way to get what is best for us. Those who get pushed and shoved out of the way are most likely left feeling unimportant and undervalued. When we set our hearts and minds on our expectations of people, or of our circumstances we will continuously find ourselves empty and disappointed.
While I’d like to say to the people who hurt my family that they’ve let me down, my husband, and my son down, I turn to the One who has never once let me down. Out of pain, anger, and bitterness, He has shaped me, molded me, and delicately formed me into the woman I am today. This is what Paul says to the Corinthians of the first century:
2 Corinthians 4:16-18*
“That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.”
Paul wrote to the Corinthians in this particular instance to encourage them to stop bickering amongst themselves. The church in Corinthians was a mess, the people were treating each other terribly and blatantly disregarding the teachings of Jesus. Paul encourages them throughout the book to forgive each other, he explains to them that all of the things we possess on the earth are not of ourselves, but of God.
I find that the entire book of 2nd Corinthians relevant to my life today. I’ve watched people in and out of the church tear each other apart, we see this in the United States clearly through this Presidential election. We are constantly divided.
Yet, there is something worse when it is aimed directly at your character. When someone betrays you, someone does not see how much their actions hurt you, it is disconcerting. The things that have happened to us recently, they’ve made me reevaluate what is important to me. My husband, our family we have together, the house we live in, and the money we make all belongs to God. As Paul points out, the things of this Earth will pass away and the things we have yet to see will continue forever.
I pray that even when those around us let us down, we can recognize the God who will never fail to let us fall into His arms. Our present troubles are not so great when we stare into the face of eternity. The words said about us out of anger or retaliation are not of God, and do not define us. I pray that every day I can take time to thank God for all He has given to me even when people fail.